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June 24, 2005
Many people I encounter
Many people I encounter say they don’t know how I can work with terminally ill children. Most of them say they would not be able to do it themselves. (I actually bet they could.)
I’ve been asked countless times why I do it. Why I choose to subject myself to such sadness and sorrow? The following e-mails I received this week explain why:
Dear Trevor
I just want to thank your for your kindness and caring that you have shown not only to Tylor but to our whole family. These past five years have been really hard and heart-breaking for us. I truly believe that you are an angel sent from God to help us out in our time of need. The doctors say he won't survive as the cancer is spreading all over, but I am still hanging on to that last thread of hope that there is something or someone who can cure the cancer or even stop the growth of it. Even though the doctors seem to have given up, I haven’t and neither has Tylor.
Thank you for making a difference in Tylor’s life. He is really excited about the book you two are writing together. It puts a smile on his face just talking about it.
Thank you also for sending our family to Los Angeles and making that dream of Tylor’s come true. I am truly glad that he had a chance to meet you. You have touched his life by giving him new things to look forward to. Just hearing your voice makes him smile.
You will never be forgotten.
Denise (Mother of Tylor, 14)
Dear Trevor,
We heard you speak at the Candlelighters Luncheon in Houston a few months ago. Cameron (age 8) wasn't feeling that great that day due to high doses of steroids for his brain tumor, but he remembered the "apple juice in the specimen cup" story that you told and recently tried it on his nurses. It was hilarious... I laughed for days over the whole thing. He was so excited when he heard he finally got to "pee in a cup" that he went straight to find some apple juice. One of the nurses nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw him drink his "specimen" and everyone got a BIG kick out of your trick. Also, just this week he got to "tie his doctor up with silly string". He has been wanting to do that ever since he read your Chemo, Craziness and Comfort book. So we made a special appointment with his regular oncologist and just told him we had a surprise for him. When the doctor walked in the exam room, Cameron threw him a bottle of silly string and said ,"Defend yourself!" They both had a lot of fun spraying each other with the stuff until the bottles were empty. It was a good thing it was the end of the day because the room was a MESS afterwards. Once again, we all laughed and had a great time thanks to you.
My son has had an amazingly positive experience and attitude concerning all his cancer treatment even though he has a wicked brain tumor. We are on our second phase I trial drug. We will see if this one does anything to slow these tumors down, but if not he will likely die in the next few months. All this to say... thank you so much for these 2 ideas that helped us smile, laugh, and have fun in the midst of our trials. I wish I had time to tell you more about Cameron and his wonderful attitude and faith through all this, but I bet you have heard of many amazing children with cancer and can get the idea without me even telling you everything.
Thanks for making a difference in a dying child’s life. My child!
Suzie (Mother of Cameron 8)
To tell you the honest truth, even though I am sharing these letters (which is a wonderful stroke for the old ego I might add), I don’t feel worthy of the accolades these mums have showered on me because I really didn’t do much. I was just my silly old self and I simply opened my heart and ‘connected’ with these kids suffering from cancer. (Who, believe it or not, many people shy away from including some nurses.)
I share these letters because I want people to know that sometimes even the smallest, simplest things can make a huge difference. (Mostly without us even knowing it.) A smile, a hug, a touch can mean a lot. But more than anything else, acknowledging the very existence of people who are suffering, can make all the difference in the world.
Posted by trevor at June 24, 2005 10:08 PM
Comments
Trevor,
I have never met you but for what you have done for Tylor and his family, I will forever hold you dear in my heart. I love seeing Tylor brighten when he talks about you. You have truly touched his life and all those around him.
You are truly an angel sent from God. Thank you for giving the gift of yourself.
Cathy (I am Denise's aunt)
Posted by: Cathy at June 25, 2005 04:20 PM
Opening your heart, sending someone a smile, being a freind are the greatest gifts you can give.
When my brother died from cancer there were times when it was difficult to see the bright side of life. To have someone from outside the family sending a smile, telling a joke, lightening the mood in some way, can make all the difference in the world.
Someone said, Nobody needs a smile more than those who have no smiles left to give. When the parents and the family of sick children have no smiles left to give and are losing sight of what they still have over the grief of what might be coming, it is truely a blessing to get help from someone. Not just help from the doctors who mend the body but also from someone else who will help them mend the soul. The soul of the one who is physically ill and also the souls of those who sit by him/her. By giving them smiles and helping them to see the smiles that come from their children you are giving them the world.
You are doing far more good than you take credit for. But maybe that is why you are so good at it...?
Posted by: Anna at July 13, 2005 11:32 AM